Yesterday is a long day…. ermmmm or should I say today? I don’t know. So I guess it’s gonna be a long crap shit stuff that I’m gonna write about. First of all… I was not in the mood today. Prolly coz I din sleep the whole night. Not even a short nap. Or maybe it’s the rain. The rain stopped then went pouring again then stop again and it goes on and on. Now I felt tired. Maybe not… prolly brain dead by now. I din laugh much.. couldn’t laugh much.
I can’t sleep, I stay awake looking at the dark sky and the playground opposite me. Yes… its been like 7 months since I was last there. I looked at the swing and the slide. It reminded me so many things. I had a sudden rush to be at the playground. I stay still and look outside. I have no idea how long i’ve been standing there. I finally notice only 5 house lighted whole night through. Others prolly was sound asleep. It’s really quiet. I can hear myself breathing. It’s scary and it started raining again.
I din know what to do.. so I decided to watch some show. Hopefully I will be sleepy and doze to bed.. which I didn’t. I guess something funny will be good as I was not in the mood.. but somehow I wasn’t laughing. It’s a funny show… but maybe I watched it at the wrong time.
And somehow unexpectedly… while waiting.. the rain starts to come again. I hated it so much when this happen. It’s suppose to be a “It’ll be alright. Everything’s gonna be fine day” and rain starts to fall… drop by drop. It irritates me and it’s making me drowning in the rain.
Yeap… I can feel I am emotionally disturbed, senses distorted and world turning around. Yes… At times it’s really hard to say something. Sometimes the mind wants to say but the mouth can’t say the right word. Sigh… It’s weird at times.